I am the anti-foodie.

If it were possible for humans to exist without needing food, I wouldn’t eat at all. I don’t enjoy eating and a lot of different types of food freak me out.

In part, I blame my mother for my lack of interest and excitement in food. Growing up, we lived on a lot processed food for much of my childhood and that’s all I’ve ever known. Every dinner was a frozen ready meal or similar and our microwave was her best friend. Whenever we ate out, we choose somewhere “safe”, somewhere with pizza or burgers on the menu – things that I would order 99% of the time.

But the blame doesn’t lie entirely with her.

It’s how she was brought up by her mother, and so she suffered from the exact food issues as me when she was a child. From speaking to her recently she told me that every day of the week, she knew exactly what would be served for dinner:

Monday would be fish, Tuesday – sausages, Wednesday – pasta, Thursday – burgers, Friday – take out, Saturday – beans on toast, Sunday – casserole.

That’s what she ate every single day for much of her childhood.

We’re a family of bland eaters.

So by her not having had any real experience with different types of food, she didn’t feel the need to try anything new or encourage her children to either. Apparently I was a pretty fussy child, though, so even when she did try to encourage me to branch out, I would refuse to try new things.

Sympathise with my Dad. My Dad adores all types of food, from all different countries. I think he realised that he was going to have some difficulty when, on his first date with my Mum, he had to introduce her to pizza! At 18 years old, my Mum had never had pizza!

The first reaction I got from my friends when telling them all about my trip was, “but what are you going to do about the food?!”. They found it hysterical that I was going to be travelling all around the world, and yet had never eaten the most basic of foods.

To give you some idea of just how inexperienced I am with trying different foods…

  • I have eaten rice FIVE times in my whole life. Yes, five. And by times I mean picking up a grain of rice and resting it on my tongue for a few seconds. I don’t think I actually even swallowed it. I hate the smell of curry and rice reminds me of that smell so… I’m definitely nervous about heading to Asia.
  • I’ve never eaten an egg. Never.
  • I tried Chinese food for the FIRST time in my life this year. Likewise, I only tried Indian and Thai food within the last few months. And I’m not really sure I can call it trying them because I had them at a buffet restaurant that serves Chinese, Indian, Thai and Italian food. Well, I really liked Chinese food, Indian food was TOO SPICY, and Thai food tasted… Strange.

Judge me, please. I judge myself for being so terrible with food!

Trying scary foods for the first time!

Knowing all the different food I’m going come across on my trip is somewhat of a concern for me.  It’s either going to be amazing and I’m going to discover all these wonderful foods that I could have easily gone the rest of my life not knowing about, or it’s going to be a complete disaster and I won’t eat a thing for months and months!

Strangely, I’m really excited about it.

Despite my lack of experience, I am still willing to try absolutely anything and everything on my trip. I can’t think of much I wouldn’t try, and even though I probably won’t like half of it, it’s going to be absolutely hilarious trying it all. One of the first places I’ll be visiting on my travels is Australia and already I’ve been scared by the stories my Australian friends have told me about food — Vegemite, kangaroo, shark…

After realising that my experiences with food are unique, and there is literally NOBODY I know who is as bad with food as I am, well, the only logical thing to do was to start up a food section on my blog:

Lauren Vs. Food.

I have a feeling food is going to win a lot…

So wherever I am in the world, if I see something completely insane or terrifying – or even something as simple as an egg (hahaha), I’m going to try it, I’m going to blog about it and video myself eating it too!

Everyone tells me that by the time I return back home, I will detest all the old food I used to love and have evolved into Miss Worldly, eating crazy, foreign foods every night of the week. I’m doubtful, but anything can happen, and it should be a lot of fun experimenting.

As I said above, I’m happy to try pretty much anything I’ll come across on my trip, so if you have any suggestions for me or if there’s something completely insane that you want me to eat while I’m out there, leave a comment and let me know and I’ll do my best to hunt it down!

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